Temptation

Slut: Someone who delivers on any promises made of sexual satisfaction.

Sometimes, there are really too many things going on around me. For instance, in the midst of trying to locate a new apartment in this ridiculous city, the guy next to me, my roommate is on www.manhunt.net looking up a guy to hook up for the night. Of course, I discovered Manhunt back before Manhunt was even cool. I mean, we're talking the summer of 2002 when AOL was getting old, and all the hotties were on Manhnut.

Of course, as someone who is currently enrolled in a "Twelve Step Program" to curb my interest in these sites, I felt compelled to offer my roommate some helpful tips. You know, things like, "Oh, well you know that rule that if you take a cab there and back to the hook up you get to fuck twice because it's just common courtesy." And of course there's the inevitable fact that everyone on those sites only posts pictures of themselves at their absolute sexiest best. This means that really, when you get there, you're always disappointed. Sure, the package might be the right size and the sex might be great, but the body you lusted after and the face that gave you a hard-on just don't quite match. This was the reason I always posted a decent picture of myself; I used a picture that I looked good in, but one that I knew I could, even on my worst day, muster up the energy to look just cute enough. Often times, I'd hear guys tell me that I was so much cuter in person. And it's always nice to hear how good you look.

So my roommate went out for his little hook-up, and in the morning was raving about it. This of course is the difference between true sluts and those that wish they were. TRUE sluts, people like me, really have lots of sex with lots of people, but most people never suspect us for being like that. I firmly believe that the louder you shout it, the less true it is. I mean, Tom Cruise, case and point. And, the obvious American Pie 2 references aside, it is generally true that guys will say they've had more sex than they have had and girls often deny having any at all.

All this reminds me of the time I was in the internet cafe for the first time one night pretty late. I had been using internet cafes to get work done (legitimate volunteer commitment)... suddenly, I looked over and everyone else was watching PORN on the computer screen and I was worrying about helping deaf people. I felt very out of place. How odd. I never understood why when we were in high school everyone always wanted to watch porn at parties... it always just made me horny. I mean seriously, like we all need more temptation.