Homosexual Suspect

A blog addressing the trials and tribulations of a real-life (mostly) gay sex addict. Designed to raise awareness of the reality of this disease, the goal is not to glorify or make light of a terrible affliction, but rather to candidly illustrate what it's like from my perspective. For sex addicts, sexual compulsives, romantic obsessives and the friends and family thereof. Title derived from the title of Jenny Garp's bestseller Sexual Suspect in John Irving's classic The World According to Garp.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

HS MIA

grabby sex- the kind of sex where your hands never leave your partner's body; often associated with groping. see also, light bondage

Aside from just being busy with work, moving, and shopping for the new place, I really have no good excuse to have been gone so long.

Mr. Lee and I are still just in the "seeing each other" phase. I guess we DID finally have sex actually. At first, I thought I would consciously take it slow and it would just be obvious to him that I was doing that without us actually having to have that stupid conversation. (e.g. "I think we're moving too fast." In my HS reality, I think that when people have that conversation they're not even moving too fast. That conversation should be reserved for that friend that we all have that met a guy and got engaged three weeks later. I think that conversation is used so often by singles who are just not really interested in each other, that is out of stock for the fuckwits who really need to have that conversation.) It is definitely great to have a boy like Mr. Lee in your life who you kind of think actually might be into you as much as you're into him. Whatever the "status" or level of commitment you establish might be.

Of particular interest to HS readers: Mr. Lee is a dirty talker. I remember when I was like 17 in high school and we'd rent porn just for fun and then sit around and comment on the sex like we all really knew what the hell we were talking about. Specifically, I remember one movie, "Black Anal Memoirs" (which I believe received the acronym "BAM" and ended up in a lot of yearbooks, and on the back of senior shirts, etc.) At one point there was a lot of dirty talking, and I said then, "I think you must be having pretty bad sex if you can put sentences together while you're getting fucked." How naive!

What I find fascinating is that generally, the bad ass guys I've been with are never the dirty talkers. I'd say that often it's the super-cute, very nice guys who suddenly make me their "bitch boy" and continue to ask me "how I like it" and "do [I] want more?". I myself would go into that category of nice-looking boy, but I kind of stick to the relatively clean sex talking (you know, I repeat things a lot, "Mr. Lee, Mr. Lee" or "yeah" or whatever). But Mr. Lee himself is pretty graphic sometimes and it really turns me on. I don't enjoy being treated like someone's bitch, and thankfully Mr. Lee doesn't do that. Instead, he like channels some of the nasty girls in BAM and says things like, "I want you inside me." It's kind of great to feel wanted in bed.

Another way I think people make others feel wanted in bed is to just be very grabby. I myself am definitely into grabby sex. That's the kind of sex where afterwards you both end up with lots of red handprints on each other. Please understand that grabbing does not mean slapping the shit out of someone. Instead it's just like rubbing and all. Grabby sex also makes me feel wanted.

Because of the sheer nature of my last job, I spent a lot of time in hotels. My roommate, Oreo and I were discussing hotel sex with Oreo's big black friend/lover last night (we'll call benefriend MIB, because he's kind of a secret agent and I love Will Smith). At any rate, it so turns out that Oreo and I will both be in Washington this week for work, and MIB is planning to come visit. So, MIB was saying that he could maybe bring one of those blacklights like the ons in CSI to the hotel room to check out all the semen stains. Well, Oreo had mentioned that she was recently watching the "Sunday Night Sex Show" on Oxygen with that awesome woman, Sue Johannson and Sue was working with 5 couples to improve their sex lives. Each couple was to try out a different position each night and then report on the show the next night. Well, apparently, many of the positions were consistently tried out on the desk in the hotel room. And of course they were. We all know how nasty those comforters are in hotel rooms, so if I'm gonna lay my naked ass down anywhere, you can bet your sweet naked ass it would be on the fine veneer finish of the desk. That's a surface I know that can be adequately cleaned. In fact, I was telling Oreo and MIB about how one of my top 10 best sexual experiences actually took place in a hotel room on the desk. It was great sex where we just kind of moved the desk all over the room with all the fucking. At one point the lamp fell of the desk and came out of the wall, but I digress.

For the next week, I'll be traveling for work to Washington, DC and I certainly plan to come back with much to report. I've spent a lot of time there and have met lots of interesting men there. I had my first real "conquest" fuck there -- and came out thoroughly disappointed. I met a man that liked to give himself enemas and then whip my balls with his belt. Then there was the man who liked to have everything incredibly clean and couldn't let germs get anywhere. I also met my first foot fetish man who insisted I wear shower shoes (regular flip flops just would not do). So, I think, in honor of my visit to our nation's capital next week, I will be dedicating my blog to the crazy men of Washington and the crazy sex they make you have.

Additionally, I think that starting the week of February 13, I will be seriously thinking back on my top 10 sexual encounters and will discuss them in countdown form starting that week. I'll need to check my notes on this, so I'll work hard to have all of the research completed in time.

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